Hank Posted July 18, 2020 Report Posted July 18, 2020 50 minutes ago, Mcstealth said: 26. My mother taught me what an emergency is: "You'll shoot your eye out" "It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye." 2 1
EricJ Posted July 18, 2020 Report Posted July 18, 2020 3 hours ago, Hank said: "It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye." "It's not funny until someone gets hurt." 2
Awful_Charlie Posted July 18, 2020 Report Posted July 18, 2020 5 hours ago, EricJ said: "It's not funny until someone gets hurt." ... and then it's hilarious 4
Missile=Awesome Posted July 18, 2020 Report Posted July 18, 2020 1 hour ago, Awful_Charlie said: ... and then it's hilarious The best humor to me is when you are cringing and uncomfortable...Most humor comes at someone or somethings expense. We need to be able to identify and be relieved it’s “not me”...and then it is...oh crap. LOL. Jimmy and Bill are my favorite standup guys right now. I am constantly going “Oh no, don’t go there”....and they do. Nervous laughter ensues...Priceless. 1
Missile=Awesome Posted July 19, 2020 Report Posted July 19, 2020 7 hours ago, xcrmckenna said: Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk If you are going to crash an airplane that looks like a beautiful place to do it. Gorgeous, except for the bent metal on brand B...Harrison’s golf course choice was also excellent for scenery. 1
Mcstealth Posted July 20, 2020 Author Report Posted July 20, 2020 21 hours ago, xcrmckenna said: Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Terrible. Just terrible. 1
cliffy Posted July 20, 2020 Report Posted July 20, 2020 Yes but my eye doc just flew into town yesterday in his Cirrus!!! The new doctor killer
Air pirate Posted July 20, 2020 Report Posted July 20, 2020 What do a gynecologist and a pizza delivery man have in common? they can both smell it but they can’t eat it! i think I hit the curb with this one 2
MooneyMitch Posted July 21, 2020 Report Posted July 21, 2020 ...............and in the midst of it all, there's this beauty!! 7
MooneyMitch Posted July 24, 2020 Report Posted July 24, 2020 “It’s time for Dodger baseball “ Vin Scully.
MooneyMitch Posted July 28, 2020 Report Posted July 28, 2020 I’ve recently taken up fishing myself......... 6
thinwing Posted July 28, 2020 Report Posted July 28, 2020 A well dressed gentleman knocks on the door of Butte Montana brothal.I want to see Vicky he says.The madam that answers says,she is our most expensive lady...don’t care says the gentleman,send me Vicky.Vicky than appears in very seductive dress and says that will be 5000 dollars for a visit.The gentleman hands her the money ,goes up stairs and stays for an hour.The next evening...the same well dressed man knocks on the door and says go get Vicky.She appears and says it’s very unusual for a second visit so soon as I’m very expensive.Its 5000 dollars ,no discounts!The man again hands her the money and spends another hour upstairs with her.The very next night,the same guy pounds on the door and says I need to see Vicky.She is astounded,Nobody has ever stayed with me for 3 in a row.she says .it’s still 5000 dollars by the way.He again hands her the money and spends another hour upstairs with her.As he is leaving...she says...you must be rich...where are you from?Im from Great Falls he says.Oh that’s we’re my family is from she says.I know says he,your sister died last week and I am her lawyer.She willed you 15 thousand dollars and the will says to give it to you!......the moral of this story...what is inevitable?...death,taxes and some lawyer trying to screw you 1 4
MooneyMitch Posted July 28, 2020 Report Posted July 28, 2020 15 minutes ago, thinwing said: A well dressed gentleman knocks on the door of Butte Montana brothal.I want to see Vicky he says.The madam that answers says,she is our most expensive lady...don’t care says the gentleman,send me Vicky.Vicky than appears in very seductive dress and says that will be 5000 dollars for a visit.The gentleman hands her the money ,goes up stairs and stays for an hour.The next evening...the same well dressed man knocks on the door and says go get Vicky.She appears and says it’s very unusual for a second visit so soon as I’m very expensive.Its 5000 dollars ,no discounts!The man again hands her the money and spends another hour upstairs with her.The very next night,the same guy pounds on the door and says I need to see Vicky.She is astounded,Nobody has ever stayed with me for 3 in a row.she says .it’s still 5000 dollars by the way.He again hands her the money and spends another hour upstairs with her.As he is leaving...she says...you must be rich...where are you from?Im from Great Falls he says.Oh that’s we’re my family is from she says.I know says he,your sister died last week and I am her lawyer.She willed you 15 thousand dollars and the will says to give it to you!......the moral of this story...what is inevitable?...death,taxes and some lawyer trying to screw you That’s horrible......... 2
MooneyMitch Posted August 1, 2020 Report Posted August 1, 2020 I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on. I said "You're pulling my leg." 2 4
Mcstealth Posted August 3, 2020 Author Report Posted August 3, 2020 On 8/1/2020 at 10:47 AM, MooneyMitch said: I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on. I said "You're pulling my leg." Terrible. 1
MooneyMitch Posted August 3, 2020 Report Posted August 3, 2020 Now, remember please..... I don’t write these tasteless, horrible, disrespectful, crass, stupid and demeaning things I’ve been posting. I’m simply trying to be a good MSer and help to contribute to this particular thread, which was not started by me either. The wife has been missing a week now. Police said to prepare for the worst. So, I have been to the thrift shop to get all of her clothes back. 1 6
MooneyMitch Posted August 4, 2020 Report Posted August 4, 2020 At the senior citizens center they had a contest the other day. I lost by one point: The question was: Where do women mostly have curly hair? Apparently the correct answer was Africa!!!
Mcstealth Posted August 4, 2020 Author Report Posted August 4, 2020 3 hours ago, MooneyMitch said: At the senior citizens center they had a contest the other day. I lost by one point: The question was: Where do women mostly have curly hair? Apparently the correct answer was Africa!!! Har har har. 1
kpaul Posted August 5, 2020 Report Posted August 5, 2020 8 hours ago, xcrmckenna said: Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk I believe that would be referred to as the "Box Office" 1
Missile=Awesome Posted August 5, 2020 Report Posted August 5, 2020 Mein Gott...What are the chances of...Oh, never mind. You want REAL humor? Go to the Negativity thread. Classic Hijinx and rabscallian humor...
MooneyMitch Posted August 5, 2020 Report Posted August 5, 2020 9 hours ago, xcrmckenna said: Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Aside from the joking regarding this story.......it is a great story for sure, and that’s no joke!!! Imagine mom’s pride !! 4 1
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