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Tasteless Joke of the day.


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Okay.............I know this thread is for tasteless jokes, but I'm going to drift off a bit............maybe you're already fully aware, or have searched the story already, but here it is regardless.............

I believe this does deserve further recognition on MS. :)

 

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My wife sent me a text that said,

"Your great"

I sent her a text back that said,

"No, You're great"

 When I got back home my wife was all sweet and bubbly and happy to see me and said "Thank you for the text"

 I am on the fence about this. Should I tell her that I was correcting her grammar?

 

Edited by Mcstealth
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7 minutes ago, Mcstealth said:

My wife sent me a text that said,

"Your great"

I sent her a text back that said,

"No, You're great"

 When I got back home my wife was all sweet and bubbly and happy to see me and said "Thank you for the text"

 I am on the fence about this. Should I tell her that I was correcting her grammar?

 

Yes, tell her.   Do you have a comfy couch, blankets and pillow in your hangar? :P

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This is tasteless and reprehensible...............should fit in this thread perfectly.............

Every morning, the CEO of a large bank in Manhattan would walk to the corner where a shoe shine is always located.

He sits on the shoe shine’s comfortable chair, reads the Wall Street Journal, and the shoe shine gives his shoes a shiny, excellent look.

One morning the shoe shine asks the CEO:

“What do you think about the situation in the stock market?”

The Director arrogantly asks in turn:

“Why would you be so interested in that topic?”

“I have a million dollars in your bank,” the shoe shine says, “and I’m considering investing some of the money in the capital market.”

“What’s your name?” asks the Director.

“John H. Smith.”

The Director subsequently arrives at the bank and asks the Manager of Customer Relations:

“Do we have a client named John H. Smith?”

“Certainly”, answers the Customer Service Manager, “He is a highly esteemed customer. He has a million dollars in his account.”

The Director comes out, approaches the shoe shine and says:

“Mr. Smith, I ask you this coming Monday to be the guest of honor at our board meeting and tell us the story of your life. I am sure we will have something to learn from you.”

At the board meeting, the Executive Director introduces him to the board members:

“We all know Mr. Smith, who makes our shoes shine in the corner, but Mr. Smith is also an esteemed customer with a million dollars in his account. I invited him to tell us the story of his life. I am sure we can learn from him.”

Mr. Smith began his story:

“I came to this country fifty years ago as a young immigrant from Europe with an unpronounceable name. I got off the ship without a penny. The first thing I did was change my name to Smith. I was hungry and exhausted. I started wandering around looking for a job, but to no avail. Suddenly I found a coin on the sidewalk. I bought an apple. I had two options: eat the apple and quench my hunger or start a business. I sold the apple for two dollars and bought two apples with the money. I also sold them and continued in business. When I started accumulating dollars, I was able to buy a set of used brushes and shoe polish and started polishing shoes. I didn’t spend a penny on entertainment or clothing; I just bought bread and some cheese to survive. I saved penny by penny and after a while I bought a new set of shoe brushes and polish in different shades and expanded my clientele. I lived like a monk and saved penny by penny. After a while I was able to buy an armchair so that my clients could sit comfortably while I was cleaning their shoes, and that brought me even more clients. I did not spend a penny on the joys of life. I kept saving every penny. A few years ago, when the previous shoe shine on the corner decided to retire, I had already saved enough money to buy his shoe shine location at this great place.”

“Finally, three months ago, my sister, who was a whore in Chicago, passed away and left me a million dollars."

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1 hour ago, Yetti said:

Crap my mask   as I turn back to the car.   Like I am Batman or something

Yep...... been there done that....... several times........ that’s why I’ve got multiple fun masks (Mooney, Dodgers, etc.)..... I keep one in each vehicle now.  CRAZY!!:(

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46 minutes ago, MooneyMitch said:

This should help ! Available now through your favorite aircraft supply vendor... :lol:

AA20EDA1-6080-4EDF-AF6F-1E8EE7E2A94F.jpeg

This is quite tasteful, and I consider it to be "not" a joke. That reminds me, I need to make a stop on the way home tonight . . . . .

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