Hello all and THANK YOU! for all this.
I'll try to reply to everyone here in a go so far...
I didn't mean safety as much on the 305 per se as being an "incredibly safe and forgiving plane". Lets face it, this is a high performance airplane. I wouldn't put a new driver in my Tesla S or Ferrari and say its "safe". With that in mind I meant more safer to operate in terms of the waste gate and not ruining the engine. Safer for the plane I guess is what I mean. Sorry for not being clear. In no way do I consider the Mooney "safer" than say a 172, but at the end of the day I also don't drive a Yugo to commute to work. But the sentiment is very much appreciated there and thank you. I'm sorry about the lost pilot. That is awful. Fortunately for the foreseeable future any Mooney flying will be done with a mooney trainer and then my CFI or my ATP friend who combined have probably well over 10,000 hours. Like I said, I'm risk averse as much as someone who flies can be.
Next... I want a Mooney specific instructor for sure. So does my former ATP friend. We both want to take a week and take a man-cation to a place that can train us preferably on the model in question. With that in mind, I want to get my IR and maybe even some retractable gear time prior to that. I do not want to get "everything new" at once. Last year I bought a new paraglider and new paramotor; throttle in right hand instead of left, reflex wing over standard, heavy 4-stroke motor, under seat reserve... everything was new. Know what I did? Put a line through the prop. Yes, its only a $15 mistake, but it was the principle that too many changes at once was not good. I want to get proficient in the 172 to the point that safety and flying are routine; then get my IR until IFR flying is routine. I don't plan on flying in IMC if i can avoid it (which normally one can) but if I end up VMC->IMC becuase something went wrong I want to know I can deal with it. Or at least be able to get out of it.
right now I'm at 50 hours to whom asked. Although technically I have met all my requirements, I am going a couple mock-check-rides, few more solo and dual XC flights, and going to space it to about 65-70 hours I think. I'm not in a rush and honestly... the cost isn't an issue. My CFI is a nice guy, and he wants to just do some flying after my license and start my IR when ready. He flies executives around so he has an open schedule which makes it easy to get a lesson on a random day every week.
Oh, and I do plan on trying to get some time in a Mooney (thus the instruction) prior to purchase. The only disadvantage is I'm not sure it will be the same model but I assume I can get a fair sense from say... 231 vs 253 vs Bravo? I think there are some body length differences and such but I wouldnt buy a car without having driven one either, and everyone in the "fabric wing" world always test jumps/flies gear before they buy it. Its very routine.
I think that is all I have so far for replies. I'll hit those resources. I'm very methodical and slow so this process may take a year, it may take 2, before I'm even at the point of selecting a plane. Right now its find options, get all the training possible, fly the heck out of the school plane(s), get VFR and IFR flying to "second nature", and then get into one of my own. I have a lot of responsibility with my job, mymarriage, my animal rescue... I can't be stupid, and that's why I'm picking all your collective brains